How to win friends and influence people? (random thoughts)
This week I'm noticing that certain acquaintances have a strong tendency to point out the positive, and to generally tell everyone: "Here's how you're awesome." In general these are people that I like, but not people that I would ever be best friends with.

I wonder a bit about how much of this is innate, and how much of it is learned. It's certainly akin to the recommendations of _How to Win Friends..._ and similar works, but I kind of suspect that the reason I see these behaviors is that they are simply more natural for these individuals. I'd like to more concretely know which way it is, but I don't know that I could determine that without asking. And if I ask, I'm not sure that I'd get a straight answer.

On certain levels I'm inclined to emulate the behavior, but I question the degree to which it would work for me, even if it works for them (which it may or may not do). It certainly is not my natural pattern, and what comes across as sincere enthusiasm from one person might feel more like manipulative flattery from another.

There's more complexity to this issue as well. Some people tend to find chipperness abrasive, and it may be the case that most people like different approaches at different times and would appreciate having a diversity of outlooks. By asking an opinion of the correct person, you can assure yourself of the type of feedback you'd like (positive or negative, sincere or less so, instinctive or dispassionate).

Perhaps the best approach is to play to one's own comparative advantage.